


Walking their way back home

by sinfuldesire_archivist



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Drama, Hurt/Comfort, Season/Series 06
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-17
Updated: 2011-04-17
Packaged: 2018-09-06 19:39:43
Rating: Teen & Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,454
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8766373
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinfuldesire_archivist/pseuds/sinfuldesire_archivist
Summary: This is my coda to 6.17, it felt like it needed a touch more. It's all about Bobby, drinking, and Balthazar...Please read and review.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the Sinful Desire archivists: this story was originally archived at [Sinful-Desire.org](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Sinful_Desire). To preserve the archive, we began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2016. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [Sinful Desire collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/sinfuldesire/profile).

  
Author's notes: Some folk wonder why I got Balthazar cast the way I do, first this is gonna be AU. Secondly in the research I've done Balthazar is a demon, so I'm picturing him as somewhere in between. A rebellious angel who is not totally evil or a rebellious demon who's not totally good. Take your pick, I just hope you like the story. ;^)  
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* * *

The room reeks of stale whiskey sweat. There’s an empty bottle of Wild Turkey in the floor, a half full one on the desk. There are books scattered from here to East Jesus on various subjects but all dealing with the intolerable subject of finding out how to gank this “mother of all.” 

 

Dean and Sam stand in the doorway and look down at the prone whiskey laden, nearly comatose body of their friend, their ‘uncle’, probably the closest thing that they’ve got to a daddy, before or after John died.

 

“Should we wake him?” Sam asked quietly.

 

“Nah, let him sleep, probably the best sleep he’s had.” Dean noted. 

 

They turned away from the study and stepped through the kitchen and carefully across creaking floorboards and out the back door. They took a couple of steps then looked at each other. Dean sighed. “It’s a good thing I gave up smoking. I’d done be through a whole pack by now.” 

 

“I didn’t know you smoked?” Sam replied.

 

“Tried it for a while when I was hunting with Dad and on my solo’s just to give me something to do on those long waits. But I learned a few things. First a baddie can smell you before they see you, Second smoking made me reek of nicotine, and last I had to seriously air out the house after one long trip when Dad was off hunting and I was left behind with a busted ankle.” Dean laughed harshly, “Smoking may be fine for some folk and I ain’t knocking it if it gets them through, it just never helped me out. But when I was smoking I was a nervous smoker.”

 

“A what…what’s a nervous smoker other than the obvious.” Sam asked.

 

Dean leaned against one of the wrecks in the yard. “I would smoke more when my nerves were on edge. And the more on edge I was the more I smoked, sometimes chaining them, lighting up a fresh one off the nearly burned out butt of one I had in my mouth.” Then Dean shrugged in his easy no-nonsense fashion. “And I thought it was cool too. Dad used to bitch about it and that made me smoke more. Took me all of a year to quit. Went cold turkey, worst experience of my life.” 

 

He looked back at the house and sighing, “We may as well sit this one out, he’s gonna be a while waking up from that toot.” Just then the back door banged open and Bobby leaned over the railing puking his shoes up. Dean and Sam traded a look of resignation. This wasn’t going to be easy for them but they knew they had to face it. 

 

Walking back up to the house they stopped for a moment and let Bobby gather himself before another explosive round of puking emptied what little he had in his stomach up. He wiped his face with one hand and drug his sleeved arm across his mouth with his other. 

 

“Bobby.” Dean said quietly as they walked up. Bobby look up at them a moment, his eyes bloodshot and weary. 

 

“Thought you boy’s done left.” He said weakly.

 

“Come on back inside. I’ll get some coffee started for ya, while you take a shower.” Dean said with a smile.

 

“Yeah I do kinda reek, don’t I?” Bobby said smirking slightly, then turning he staggered back into the house and started undressing in the kitchen. A few minutes later they heard the water running in the downstairs bathroom shower. Sam walked through and picked up the discarded clothing and tossed them onto the washing machine. He looked at Dean who grimaced slightly at the sweat sour tang that was on the clothes. 

 

After a few minutes they heard the water shut off, the sound of feet shuffling, then Bobby, naked save for a towel wrapped decorously around his hips walked across the hall and into his bedroom. He was several minutes more before he came in and sat down at the kitchen table looking at the steaming mug of coffee.

 

“Guess I owe you boys one.” He started.

 

“You’re fine Bobby, besides we owe you more than we can start to pay back.” Sam said sitting down at the other side of the table.

 

“I’m not fine, I’m a fricking sot is what I am. Got more’n a little wasted on that shit and for what, trying to find some information up on someone that no one’s got record of. Then shit Balthazar pulls his little stunt with the Titanic and screws everything up for a while.” 

 

“What do you remember?” Dean asked cautiously as they sat there looking at each other.

 

“What do you mean ‘what do I remember’? You talking about Fate and her bullshit.” Bobby said his colour starting to return to normal.

 

“That’ll do for a start.” Dean said. Then Bobby recounted in a broken manner his research and their talks and he kept looking at them with this haunted look in his eyes.

 

“Do you remember anything else?” Sam asked.

 

“No.” Bobby said too quickly.

 

“Shit…” Dean spouted, “You do remember…about Ellen.”

 

“Ain’t nothing I can do about that.” Bobby said looking into the black depths of his coffee mug. Then he looked up at them his eyes filling and brimming. He coughed and wiped at his eyes a moment. “You boys go take a turn about the yard, see if anything’s missing.”

 

“Bobby, we’re here for you man.” Sam said quietly.

 

“This is something I gotta deal with, give me five.” Bobby said after a moment, his eyes filled again. Dean and Sam quickly got and and walked by each reaching out and squeezing a shoulder of their foster father. 

 

They walked out into the yard and looked one way then another and started walking through the back part of the yard.

 

“What are you thinking Dean?” Sam asked.

 

“What do ya mean, what am I thinking?” Dean asked in return.

 

“I’m your brother, I know your looks and that’s a “I’m about to do something stupid.” Look.” Sam said trying to find some humour in the situation.

 

“Dean…You’re not thinking of making a deal?” Sam said…

 

Dean whirled, “Sam, I can’t fix everything, but if there was some way I could make a deal with Balthazar that wouldn’t gank me, I would in a heartbeat.”

 

“You don’t know until you ask.” An educated British voice said from behind them. They whirled and faced down Balthazar. 

 

“What are you talking about?” Dean asked.

 

“Dean don’t!” Sam warned, you’ve already been through it with the hellhounds, you want to do that again?” Sam said fearfully. Balthazar smiled benevolently for a moment and looked from one to the other.

 

“You know all deals don’t involve that sort of thing. In fact, well you tell me what would you like to deal on?” Balthazar asked.

 

“Dean!” 

 

“Ellen & Jo Harvelle” Dean said shoving Sam when he tried to crowd him.

 

“Sorry laddie, those two are out of my bailiwick to be able to handle.” Balthazar said quickly. “Though I wish we did have them they’d make grand bargaining chips, especially since they took out a whole pack of Hell Hounds. Bloody good job of it as well, but their self-sacrifice like that, well let’s say the Recording Angel took one look at them and said “Come on in.”

 

“So they’re in Heaven?” Sam said relieved.

 

“Yes, much to the consternation of several of us. They were given preferential treatment. My little trick brought them back, but it would have been for a short while until Atropos caught up with them. She’s a canny one I’ll give her that. Not a bad looker though.” Balthazar said.

 

“Then there is nothing you can give us.” Dean stated flatly.

 

“Now I didn’t say that lads.” The demon said smoothly.

 

Sam bridled and grabbed Dean who shook him off.

 

“Seriously are you to together? You act like a bloody married couple.” Balthazar goaded.

 

“What we are or aren’t is nothing to you.” Sam said looked again at Dean. “Come on.” He insisted.

 

“I could go back and perhaps convince Meg to stay away from the part of town you boys appeared in giving you time to still muck up the situation with Daddy summoning Death which actually only slowed him down a little.”

 

“You would have Meg and her band of dogs avoid us?” Dean asked tempted.

 

“Sure, not the least bit of a problem.” Balthazar said.

 

“What’s the cost?” Sam asked trying to get Dean to see reason. 

 

“I may require your services in the future, I just need to be sure you would be available to help me out.” He said equitably.

 

“How many times would we be required to ‘help you out?’” Dean asked.

 

“Oh for a deal like this I would say that it would be an even dozen instances of your help.” Balthazar said smiling.

 

Dean looked aghast for a long moment. Then he slowly regained his composure and pulled himself together. He looked at Balthazar and could not thing on anything which he could say at the moment to express the loathing he felt.

 

Sam surprisingly stepped in for him. “You’ve got five seconds to step out of this dimension and back to your own place before I exorcise you. That’s as fair a deal as you could ever get.”

 

“Lad you don’t have the stones.”

 

“That’s four seconds, the clock is running.” Sam said angrily.

 

Then in a puff of sulphur Balthazar was gone. Sam looked at Dean angrily, more angry than he’d at his brother in a while.

 

“You were willing to deal…”

 

“I was wanting some peace for Bobby.”

 

“You think this would’ve brought him peace?” Sam said looking at his brother with some astonishment.

 

“I don’t know, but they had something good going on something real good…” then they traded a look and bolted back to the house. They burst in the back door to find Bobby no longer at the table. They wandered through the downstairs of the house with no luck then they started upstairs and found him in the upstairs bath. In a tub of hot water, with a straight razor gripped in one hand and poised over his naked forearm.

 

“Bobby, please, please think about this.” Dean urged wanting to try and if not get in grabbing distance to at least try and talk him down.

 

“I have thought about it. I’ve got a pretty clean slate with a little help maybe from Castiel I’ll get in to be with them.” He said tears tracking his cheeks.

 

“And you might not. Please Bobby let’s work this out.” Dean begged.

 

“What’s to work, I’m alive and Ellen’s dead, I loved her Dean…I honest to God loved her.” Bobby admitted tearfully. 

 

“And she loved you, she loved us all otherwise she wouldn’t have gone with us in to Carthage. Come on Bobby please.” Sam said in easy grabbing distance now. It only took him a moment and he lunged grabbing the straight razor and feeling the edge slice into his palm. His scream snapped Bobby out of it an and he looked at Sam. 

 

“You stupid Idgit, you oughtn’t gone and done that! Shit!” Bobby said climbing from the tub and grabbing a towel. “That hand’s gonna need stitching.” 

 

“Fine, you do it then.” Sam charged as a dressed, wet but dressed, Bobby plodded through his house cussing a blue streak as he went heading towards the stairs and then the kitchen. Dean helped Sam keep pressure on the wound until they were downstairs. 

 

Bobby cleaned and disinfected the wound then with help from Dean managed to suture the three inch gash closed and the bleeding staunched. 

 

“What the hell were you playing at?” Bobby said. 

 

Sam was flying slightly on some painkillers Bobby had in his pharmacy. His eyes were brimful when he shouted back at Bobby, “YOU STUPID FUCK! YOU ‘RE BUSY GRIEVING OVER ELLEN AND JO. GUESS WHAT, SO ARE WE WERE THERE. WE SAW IT TOO, SAW HOW HAPPY YOU WERE. MORN THAN THAT BUT NUMBNUTS HERE WAS SO WANTING TO SEE THAT HAPPINESS COME BACK TO YOU HE WAS WILLING TO DEAL!!” 

 

“SAM SHUT UP!” Dean yelled at him. It was too late, Bobby registered on the Deal word and that was all it took. His balled up fist clocked Dean square in the jaw. 

 

“I got two fists, and they are primed, no waiting!” Bobby said angrily. “You stupid fecking idgit, trying to make a deal….we already been through that once with you boy, what makes you think we want to do it again?” Bobby charged. “If Ellen and I had something in another life, that’s great, but I’m not going to risk your life to save my sorry ass like that.” Bobby whirled and stalked towards the study. 

 

“Bobby please stay away from the liquor.” Sam begged.

 

“I GOTTA HAVE SOMETHING!” Bobby roared. 

 

“What I’ve got to have is a brother who’ll get his head outta his ass and a uncle who’ll stay sober for a while. Don’t have to be a really long while, but a few days would really be cool.” Sam charged back dopily.

 

“Spoilsport.” Bobby groused.

 

“Whatever.” Sam said exhaustedly. 

 

They exchanged a look then Bobby walked into his study and crashed into his chair. Sam sat up with Dean’s help and together they walked into the study to see Bobby crashed face down on his deck over folded arms. 

 

They could tell by the hitch in his shoulders that he was crying. They also knew their friend well enough to leave him be, but who said ‘reason’ and ‘logic’ were perfect. Dean walked over to him tentatively touching his shoulder. 

 

“We loved her too.” Dean said quietly. Then he and Sam started out of study when they heard the sound of a bottle hitting the desk top and they turned to see Bobby getting ready to pour a shot, then he looked at the bottle disgustedly and sent it crashing into the fireplace grate.

 

They didn’t say a word, but Dean grabbed the trashcan from the kitchen while Sam grabbed the mop and bucket. They weren’t perfect, far from it, but at least they were walking their way back home.

 

-fin-


End file.
